


Angel of Grief

by syanblues



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel is Not Okay, Dean Dies, DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, Destiel Angst, Episode: s12e10 Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets, Hurt Castiel, Lots of Angst, M/M, Not A Happy Ending, Oneshot, Random & Short, Series Finale, Short, and i have finals so this is all i could write anyways, based on the angel of grief by william wetmore, i just needed to get this out of my chest, mentions of at least, really short trust me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2019-06-01 17:17:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15148031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syanblues/pseuds/syanblues
Summary: He realised that just like Akobel, he had fallen in love with humanity too. //Real short stuff, a lot of angst





	Angel of Grief

**Author's Note:**

> soooooo I haven't had time to write for my regular series in 3 weeks and it had been bothering me, I also iddly wondered what it would be like if Dean died forreal. Angst ensues.

 

The wind blows from the east over his face, tousled with his hair,  
the breeze like the breath of God, reminded him that it had come to an end.

It was an end he saw forshadowing, it build like a tidal wave and yet he had not been ready when it finally hit the shore.  
Because Dean was a human being, and like flowers they are meant to wither. And thus loving something destined to perish was a fool's game, and maybe the real reason why God had forbidden that his children and the children of men were ever to be together.

 

It didn't make the despair tearing inside him any less.

But he didn't cry despite his anguish. He had guided Dean himself to heaven, had watched Dean wake up to a 12 year old Sam eager to play catch and to cry when he'd been witness of Dean's happiness would be completely selfish.  
At the time he'd considered trying to talk to Dean, but he'd figured that telling him of his own death when he already seemed to have completely forgotten that the situation he was in was anything but a construct from his soul and best memories would just make him want to fight back because that was just the way Dean was, and he'd been fighting so long that to take away the absolute peace he was in would be heartless.  
So he'd walked away, stepped out of heaven and made an oath to never come back because being in the space as Dean would eventually tempt him to try to reach him again.

And he'd decided to go to his favourite place on Earth.

  
He admired the view of the the volcano he had from the angle he was sitting on, legs dangling from the side of the treetop. His eyes also laid on a family having a picnic, that despite knowing the danger of the bomb his father had placed underneath the ground with the capability of completely erradicating humankind, decided to overlook it in the sake of enjoying the beauty of whatever else was around it.

 

When sitting over what, he had decided, was the edge of the word his mind wondered to many things.

 

He thought about Akobel, and something about the day he died made Castiel reminisce. He remembered reading Akobel's sentence, remembered the disgust he'd once felt for him, and the love Akobel felt for Lily Sunders.  
_How could anyone know them and not love them?_ Had he said before his murder, and this day on Castiel could not agree more.

Because of how loud and unashamedly they felt, their love for music and their love for each other. Because they were flawed, because they were passionate, because they cried and because they made Castiel love what he had never felt and appreciate things he could never quite wrap his head around but understood that to them, love didn't need to be understood.

 

So now that Dean Winchester was dead, that Sam was to an extend safe and that this chapter in his life had come to an end. He realised that just like Akobel, he had fallen in love with humanity too.

And despite having made a positive inpact on him, it had left Castiel devastated.

 

He collapsed, grieving for the one left behind, he wondered if in all of eternity he'd ever feel complete again,  
And he wept over the dismantled altar of life.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is really freaking short, but overwriting just didn't feel right. And i've been busy studying for the past 3 weeks so, why not? Also the angel of grief is breathtaking and i'm a sucker for art bye.


End file.
